Cover of A Book About Love

A Book About Love

"Jonah Lehrer has a lot to offer the world....The book is interesting on nearly every page....Good writers make writing look easy, but what people like Lehrer do is not easy at all." —David Brooks, The New York Times Book Review

Read more

Science writer Jonah Lehrer explores the mysterious subject of love.

Weaving together scientific studies from clinical psychologists, longitudinal studies of health and happiness, historical accounts and literary depictions, child-rearing manuals, and the language of online dating sites, Jonah Lehrer's A Book About Loveplumbs the most mysterious, most formative, most important impulse governing our lives.

Love confuses and compels us—and it can destroy and define us. It has inspired our greatest poetry, defined our societies and our beliefs, and governs our biology. From the way infants attach to their parents, to the way we fall in love with another person, to the way some find a love for God or their pets, to the way we remember and mourn love after it ends, this book focuses on research that attempts, even in glancing ways, to deal with the long-term and the everyday. The most dangerous myth of love is that it's easy, that we fall into the feeling and then the feeling takes care of itself. While we can easily measure the dopamine that causes the initial feelings of "falling" in love, the partnerships and devotions that last decades or longer remain a mystery. This book is about that mystery. Love, Lehrer argues, is not built solely on overwhelming passion, but, fascinatingly, on a set of skills to be cultivated over a lifetime.

Audience
adult
Length
medium · 304 pages

Click a tag to see books like this one that share it. Point at it (on a phone, tap it) for less of it instead.

Read it? Sign in to help tag it.

Liked A Book About Love? Here’s where I’d start.

These suit anyone who liked A Book About Love. Sign in and mark a few books for picks shaped around your own taste.

  1. You Are Not So Smart: Why You Have Too Many Friends on Facebook, Why Your Memory Is Mostly Fiction, and 46 Other Ways You're Deluding Yourself Shares nonfiction, psychology, science
  2. Awkward: The Science of Why We're Socially Awkward and Why That's Awesome Shares nonfiction, psychology, self-help
  3. Monologue Shares nonfiction
  4. Kidding Ourselves: The Hidden Power of Self-Deception Shares nonfiction, psychology, self-help

“People who read A Book About Love tend to reach for these next.”

  1. The Living Years: The First Genesis Memoir
  2. Silent Waters
  3. The Big New Yorker Book of Cats
  4. Outpost: Life on the Frontlines of American Diplomacy: A Memoir

“If you want more of the same (psychology), start with these.”

  1. The Examined Life: How We Lose and Find Ourselves
  2. The Psychology Book
  3. How the Body Knows Its Mind: The Surprising Power of the Physical Environment to Influence How You Think and Feel
  4. The Memory Palace - Learn Anything and Everything

“If it was the self-help that hooked you, try one of these.”

  1. Mastermind: How to Think Like Sherlock Holmes
  2. The Tell: The Little Clues That Reveal Big Truths about Who We Are
  3. Me, Myself, and Us: The Science of Personality and the Art of Well-Being
  4. Better Than Normal: How What Makes You Different Can Make You Exceptional

“These start from a similar idea, even if they go somewhere else with it.”

  1. A World of Babies: Imagined Childcare Guides for Seven Societies
  2. How to Build Self-Discipline: Resist Temptations and Reach Your Long-Term Goals
  3. A Natural History of Homosexuality
  4. How to Fall in Love with Anyone: A Memoir in Essays